More Varmints

As if squirrels weren't nemesis enough, once again a family of raccoons has moved into the 'condo in the sky' that is our neighbour's roof-top deck. Every night at dusk they emerge, and between midnight and 1 a.m., they return via my backyard. My staff must leash me for 'final pee' since mama raccoon could easily rip me apart, trying to defend her babies. I don't realize the danger...I just instinctively chase and bark at all intruders to our perimeter. That's my job, don'tcha know.

Dastardly squirrels again!

I was taken aback by the sight of a squirrel, my arch enemy, on my back deck railing, peering into the kitchen at me.....with my donut rawhide in his mitts. Gadzooks! How could that have happened?!! My staff could not answer. She knows not the secret movement of the donut rawhide, which I alone must conquer. And reclaim what is rightfully mine. Of course, how would I know if my staff, who is not normally duplicitous, hid a brand new donut rawhide in my bed, hoping that I would not notice?

Orange w. Polka Dots

I got a new collar and matching lead. My staff picked it up at swanky Eye Spy. They were reduced by 50% because "Leslieville is not yet ready to spend ridiculous amounts of money on its dogs." Pfft.

The matchy set is orange with polka dots. Fun!

A #1 clipper, please

I look like a chenille sweater. I was groomed at UrbanDog, enjoying a hydromassage bath, shampoo, conditioner, brush out, and hand blow dry with a "puppy cut." My staff has the good sense not to impose the ridiculous traditional Bichon-fro.

My report card says I was "a suspiciously perfect dog." I'm pleading the 5th. Well, I would if I were an American dog.

Look who's 5!

It's my birthday. Suck it, Tanya!

Who needs Wii-Fit?!

My staff must now refrain from calling me Mr. Tubby. Turns out, the nice vet man thinks I'm muscular, active, with a good heartbeat, and the perfect weight. I've lost .8 of a pound since last year! I think it has something to do with my sister biting my tail and chasing me around. She's my Juni-Fit. And high-end kibbles instead of meatloaf.

...and she looks ridiculous.

My staff acquired a Wii. It looks likes she's watching television, but she's flailing around and gesticulating with a white baton. I am not sure about this. Less hands available to scritch me.

I want to go to Tuscany. Very civilized.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/europe/article3578748.ece

Spring Apres Ski at home

My staff and I hung out on the back deck today, basking in the warm afternoon sun and silence (no one in the neighbourhood has set up their lawn furniture or backyard party tents yet). It's nice to have a west-facing backyard, especially in the spring.

Birthday Boodle

My staff received these gorgeous flowers for her birthday, from her friend K in NYC. Since there was distracting raclette at the party (cheese, potatoes, bread, chorizo, gherkins), Juniper was not taking running jumps at them, and the flowers have generously lasted more than a week. Spring is lovely, especially when it comes reluctantly, don't you think?

My staff also received fabulous books, bath salts, soap, single malt Scotches, fine wine, tattoos, the coveted Tilley hat, Mexican bingo (Loteria), a huge Civello Spa certificate, an Oilily pink top, fridge magnets, a weeping magical pussy willow, and fancy tea! Forty isn't so bad, after all. She had a very good month. Time to pass the baton....

Snowshoeing, sledding, and skating on the lake

My staff took me to Cedar Grove Lodge in Hunstville after her 40th birthday Raclette-Wii blowout. I had a blast. As you can see, it was a Bichon winter.

We stayed with Lady L in a cabin named Raven. But I'd go back for sure, not "nevermore"...


Crossing the lake.


Have blanket and pillow, will travel.


I made this snow cat! Okay, not really.


Igloo friends.

I like Pear.

Very much so. It's my new favorite fruit. I also like bananas, apples, oranges, and peaches. But not melon. Melon blows.

The Molloys can't be trusted with yellow liquid

I urinated on the Klarer carpet, then my staff spilled green tea lemonade on the Klarer couch.

Happy Beaster

When I eat all of my kibble, I see a bunny!

Juniper wanted a birthday drink at Teddy's

Juniper escaped out the front door on her birthday. She raced at full throttle straight up to 4 lanes of traffic on Queen Street East, followed by my staff in her socks- out of her head with panic and fear and piercing nanosecond images from the horrific dream that has haunted her since I came home in a cardboard box. Many people watched the two pass, and didn't do a thing. Luckily, a glazed but quick-thinking man saw them coming, as he was having a smoke outside Teddy's Sports Bar, on the north-east side of the street. He tore across the road, and headed her off at the pass, a mere metres from devastation and heartbreak, and my staff coming c0mpletely undone. If she had shoes on, she might have offered him a beer. That man is a hero.

You're my Venus...you're my fire!

Aunt K gave Juniper a natty pink bandana for her first birthday. The tag says "Bandana-Rama(tm) Bandana. Jouet pour chien."

Screaming bark or adorable plea?!! Hard to choose.

When my staff leaves, I bark. In a heightened panic.

Conversely, Juniper gets into her bag ("dans le sac!"), and looks up expectantly. I think Juniper's invocations are more effective....she knows women.

Busted

When my staff returned the other night, she found the photo frames from the side table on the floor, as well as a separated foam speaker cover. Juniper was probably trying to hide her stash....

Olympic Kibble Eating

When two dogs get together, we compete for food. And kibble. A whole lot of kibble has been consumed this week at my house.